Late Night Loss Chapter 10

[galadriel1010]

Now the cries of clear strong voices came ringing over the fields. Suddenly they swept up with a noise like thunder and the foremost horseman swerved, passing by the foot of the hill and leading the host back southward along the westward slopes of the Downs. After him they rode: a long line of mail-clad men, swift, shining, fell and fair to look upon.

Their horses were of great stature, strong and clean-limbed; their grey coats glistened, their long tails flowed in the wind, their mains were braided on their proud necks. The Men that rode them matched them well, tall and long limbed; their hair, flaxen pale, flowed under their light helms, and streamed in long braids behind them; their faces were stern and keen. In their hands were tall spears of ash, painted shields were slung at their backs, long swords were at their belts, their burnished shirts of mail hung down upon their knees

In pairs they galloped by, and though every now and then one rose in his stirrups and gazed ahead and to either side, they appeared not to perceive the three strangers sitting silently and watching them. The host had almost passed when suddenly Aragorn stood up, and called in a loud voice:

“What news from the North, riders of Rohan?”

With astonishing speed and skill they checked their speeds, wheeled and came charging round. Soon the three companions found themselves in a ring of horsemen moving in a running circle, up the gill slope behind them and down, round and round them, and drawing ever inwards. Aragorn stood silent, and the other two sat without moving, wondering what way things would turn.

Without word or cry, suddenly, the Riders halted. A thicket of spears were pointed towards the strangers; and some of the horsemen had bows in hand, and their arrows were already fitted to the string. Then one rode forward, a tall man, taller than the rest; from his helm as a crest a white horsetail flowed. He advanced until the point of his spear was within a foot of Aragorn’s breast. Aragorn did not stir.

“Who is this Ioan?” said the Rider, using the Common Speech of the West, in manner and tone like to the speech of Boromir, Man of Gondor.

The Riders all looked to a man behind the strangers who sighed heavily, “You’re supposed to ask them that, not me Eomer.” He was dressed as a rider but didn’t carry himself as one, his hair was raven dark and short, and his accent was similar but different to that of the riders. He didn’t have an air of authority, which was unusual considering how much they looked to him.

Aragorn stared at the man in shock, “Who are you?”

“I’m Ianto, and I’m not supposed to be here…”

“No, what are you doing here? Why are you here?”

The dark haired man rolled his eyes, “I don’t know and I still don’t know. You’re not supposed to notice me.”

“You look wrong, are you an Outlander?”

“A what?” He looked perplexed and quite scared, “Look, I don’t know what I’m doing here. I was reading my book and suddenly I’m in the back story!”

“You are! You’re an Outlander, I’ve never met an outlander before.” Everyone was watching him with excitement and he shied away, “Please, just concentrate on doing what you always do, pretend I’m not here. I don’t know why I’m here and I don’t know how to get out of here and I just want to go home and I know I’m screwing things up so please just ignore me.”

There was silence for a moment before Legolas frowned, “Where are you from? You sound like a man of Rohan.”

“Cardiff. Now, ignoring me?”

They did their best, it was true, but Eomer clearly looked to him for guidance and it clearly annoyed him. The three hunters took their leave, talking enthusiastically about their encounter, whilst the riders swept off towards Edoras, Ianto in their midst.

They made camp just before sundown with an hour of riding still to go before they reached Edoras, but Eomer was unwilling to travel in darkness with the climate of danger and fear; orcs already roamed the land and Ianto was glad of the spears, bows and swords surrounding him, no matter how nervous they made him. He ran his hands through his hair as he sat by the fire and felt the effects of four days without being able to wash his hair or shave, doing his best to ignore the effects of four days in a world he didn’t understand, feeling completely defenceless and completely alone, lost without the presence of his lover and partner.

His mind drifted inexorably to Jack, back home, or so he assumed. Was Jack worrying about him, or did he think that he’d just left him? Was he coping any better than Ianto was (which wasn’t well)? Who was looking after him if he wasn’t? “Oh Jack…” He whispered, feeling a tear dropping onto his cheek and brushing it away fiercely

“What’s Jack?” Eomer’s voice was close behind him and he jumped, reaching instinctively for the gun that hadn’t come with him (along with, embarrassingly enough, any of his clothes… probably something to do with his being in bed when he was last aware of being in Cardiff). The Rider held his hands up to show that he was unarmed, a reasonably meaningless gesture on the whole but a heartfelt one, and sat down beside the fire, realising that Ianto had forgotten or not heard his question, not realising that he’d ignored it, “Ianto, you called that word, Jack, what is it?”

He laughed bitterly and hid his face in his hands, “Jack’s not a what, he’s a who. He’s…”

“He’s…” Eomer prompted

Ianto paused a moment, considering the fact that there were no gay relationships (were there?) in Tolkein, but he found he didn’t care, he didn’t have the strength to lie, “He’s my husband, he’s my everything. I love him so much and I miss him, I just want to go home.”

The future king of Rohan stared at the fire in shock for a moment and then looked at his friend, “You’re married? To a man?”

He groaned and refused to meet his new friend’s eyes, “Yes, got a problem with that?”

“No, why would I? What’s it like being married? I mean, I get married, but only in the epilogue really, so I’ve never known what it’s like… Unless, it’s always just a fact for me, is it really like that?”

“No.” He shook his head fiercely, “It’s wonderful, knowing that he’s mine and I’m his and that people can’t argue with that. Some still do, people think that we’re wrong because we’re both men, but we know that we love each other and nothing else matters.”

“It sounds wonderful…” Eomer looked so sad that Ianto’s heart, what wasn’t in Cardiff with Jack, went out to him, “My sister, I think, knows that happiness with Faramir, they use their time as best they can. Aragorn knows it with Arwen, Galadriel and Celeborn… But Lothiriel and I, we know it only as fact.”

“It is wonderful. It’s completion, I’m sorry you don’t get to know that.”

“Yeah. You want to get home?”

Ianto laughed bitterly again, “Of course I do, more than anything… I just want Jack.”

As the sun rose they had already broken camp and were preparing to ride again. Ianto had spent four days in the saddle, more than he had in the rest of his life and it was getting painful. He groaned as he pulled himself into the saddle again and gazed towards the dawn, noting that the dusky pinks lighting the hills softly and the hazy blues drifting across the sky were exactly as he imagined them, a reproduction or a recollection of a perfect night spent with Jack under the stars. Everything was exactly as he’d imagine it, and it was scaring him.

Eomer gave a signal and they moved off, Ianto concentrating on moving with the horse to cause himself minimum pain but it was fairly ineffectual. The ride to Edoras only took an hour, but it felt like forever before they were dismounting in the courtyard and stabling their horses. One of the riders took Ianto’s horse for him and he sank gratefully against the wall, reacquainting his feet with solid ground before he felt able to walk again. A young woman was watching him and came over to offer assistance when he pushed himself away from the wall, “Ioan…”

“My name’s Ianto.” He growled

She looked startled, “Sorry sir. Ianto, would you come with me, we have somewhere you can stay whilst you’re here…” The young man felt guilty for snapping at her, but he was in pain inside and out, his heart and body both aching for different reasons. He nodded silently and followed her to a house away from the main street of the town. Inside it was dark but homely, with a few wooden beds placed in rows, but not regimented in any way. Furs and linen throws covered the beds and they looked like heaven… not that he could sleep alone, maybe at least he’d stop aching physically. “You can take the end bed. It’s part of the programme set up by the Bellman to make it better for minor characters in stories. A few novels have had their back stories fleshed out, nothing physical for the story, but it makes a big difference.”

“Thank you, I haven’t a clue what you’re talking about but thank you… What’s your name?” He blushed as he realised that he hadn’t asked before

She smiled, “I’m young Rohiric townswoman three. I don’t really have a name as such.”

“I can’t call you that, it’s too much of a mouthful… Can I call you Alwyn?” He plucked the name at random, the name of one of his friends from primary school, God that was a long time ago.

Alwyn gave him one of the brightest smiles he’d ever seen on someone who wasn’t Jack and nodded shyly, “I like that, Alwyn, thank you Ianto.”

“My pleasure.” She left him again and he fell back onto the bed she’d indicated, wanting to cry at the unfamiliarity and the homesickness that swept across him. He felt a bone deep weariness that didn’t just come from the hard riding and the lack of sleep, and despite his doubts about his ability to sleep alone he felt it tugging at his eyes, drawing him down into a blackness that was cold and empty without Jack by his side and in his arms. Terrifying figures stalked his mind, cannibals, metal monsters and men, shadows of people gone before. He sank further and further with nothing there to pull him back, he was drowning in memories and imaginations…

Ianto woke with a start to a hand on his shoulder shaking him gently, Alwyn’s voice ringing quietly in his ears, “Ianto, please Ianto, you have to wake up…” His eyes flashed open and she started back, “Ianto, you have to listen to me.”

“Alwyn, what’s happened?” He sat up and pushed the terror to the back of his mind, knowing that it would soon return to him

She looked as scared as he felt, “Are you well Ianto, you were having a nightmare.”

“Yes, I’m fine, I’m awake now, it’ll be fine, what’s the matter.” If she’d just woken him because of the nightmare he was still grateful, but her expression suggested that there was more

He was right, Alwyn took a deep breath and glanced at the man standing in the doorway watching them, “Grima Wormtongue has poisoned the King’s mind against Eomer, he has ordered him arrested. He will come for you soon, you must leave now.”

The man strode forwards and placed a hand on the girl’s shoulder, “We have readied your horse, you must ride to the Westfold now, it will be safe for you there until Wormtongue is overthrown, it’s well in the backstory, but you must stay there until we know what to do with you.”

Ianto shook his head, “I have to stay with the story, I have to know what’s going on… I have to be seen, Jack had to see me.”

“It will be no good if he sees you dead.” The man insisted, and Ianto realised that this was Hama, a fully-fledged character. Suddenly it didn’t seem like such a bad thing when they all looked to him for advice, although he still didn’t know why it was that they did that.

His blood chilled and he nodded, “Understood sir, I’m on my way.”

Outside the gates he took one look back at Edoras, at the concrete fiction, and turned away from it, heading fearfully into the back-story of a fully developed world where monsters and dangers could lurk around any corner. In fact, he reflected sourly, it was just like being at home but without the benefits of weapons he understood and a warm lover to curl up with at night.

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Author's Note: For Judy (is this a soon enough update? lol)

This chapter may not make as much sense to you as it does to me if you haven't read any Jasper Fforde. I promise that I will not go to bed tonight until I have explained it all, or as much as I can without getting completely confused...