galadriel1010 | Late Night Loss Chapter 18

Aragorn turned a body and found a generic Rohiric soldier, his bland features and blond hair indistinguishable from the last three he had searched. Up ahead he spotted a figure, kneeling on the ground with head and shoulders bent. Rhodwine, who had joined him to search for their friends when there was no sign of them in the muster after the battle, tried to draw his attention to him. “I see him.” He murmured softly with a nod, leading the way through the carnage.

As they got closer they could hear Ianto’s wracking sobs and Aragorn’s heart plummeted. They drew closer and the ranger saw, as he knew he would, Jack’s pale face and his bloodied body cradled in Ianto’s arms. The young man had clearly been crying heavily for some time, and his face was stained with tears. Aragorn approached him and crouched next to him, his heart breaking at the desolation and fear in the young man’s eyes as he looked up.

Icy fear trickled through Ianto’s veins, freezing him as it flowed. Every part of him felt cold, apart from his heart, which burned with pain. Jack was cold and dead in his arms and it had been so long, so very long. Too long.

Footsteps approached him from behind and he tensed, looking up into Aragorn’s worried grey eyes, aware that his own fear would be clearly visible to the older man. He looked back down at Jack and brushed two fingers across his cheek gently, “He’s still gone. It’s been half an hour and he’s still gone.”

Aragorn was startled by the choice of words, and more than slightly scared by them “Ianto?” A slight nod confirmed his suspicions, as if they had needed confirming, “It is as I feared then, he fell.”

Ianto sobbed and nodded again, “He saved my life, again. And now I’m scared that this is the final time.” He looked small and lost and out of place, even in the right clothes and covered his blood, his lover’s blood.

“Ianto.” He said again, swallowing hard, “Ianto, I know this is hard, but you have to leave him. He will be treated with honour, but the night is coming and we must not remain outside the city walls once darkness falls.”

He shook his head forcefully, his eyes never leaving Jack’s still, pale, beautiful face, “I can’t leave, I won’t leave, I promised I would wait with him.”

“Wait for what?” Aragorn asked softly, now deeply concerned

Ianto finally looked up again, certainty and surety shining clear through the pain in his eyes, “For him to come back.” He looked down again and stroked a shaking hand across Jack’s cheek, “He promised me. He promised he’s always come back.”

“Ianto…”

“He’s immortal.” The young man interrupted with a sigh, “He dies, but he comes back. Scared me, always scares me. It’s… complicated.” Jack hadn’t told Aragorn. Was it because he was ashamed, or wanted it to be a secret, or because he doubted…

Aragorn was stunned, if it was true, if Ianto was right, if Jack was truly immortal, what a burden would that be. To live forever, seeing everything wither and die. To love someone as powerfully as Jack clearly loved Ianto and know every day that this could be your last together and that you would have to go on living without them, forever. Was there any hell worse? “You’re not the same, are you?” He asked softly, more statement than question

Ianto shook his head, “I would give anything not to leave him, to spare him that pain.”

“The Eldar call it the gift of the Edain, the Edain see it as a curse, but even the Eldar have a way out, a final option should life prove unbearable.” Ianto remained silent, so Aragorn squeezed his shoulder briefly, grief heavy within him as he felt the way his frame still shook with the force of his pain, then stood and backed away to join Rhodwine again. They watched in silence for a while, doubt growing within them, until Aragorn eventually turned away with a sigh, “Stay with him, for as long as he needs, then bring him to the city. I will have a room prepared for him.” Rhodwine bowed slightly in understanding and the future king turned away with tread as heavy as his heart.

Crushing blackness. Gripping fear. Enveloping eternity. Dragging him down, holding him back. Guiding light. Warming voice. A light in the dark. Strong arms. Tears wet on his face.

Then came pain. The wound in his chest closing, healing. His heart contracted once, twice, struggling to find its regular rhythm even as it tried to burst out of his chest towards that voice. His lungs inflated next, pushing hard against his ribs with the first great gasp.

After that he became aware, properly, fully aware. He registered the hot, wet tears still falling across his face and the shaking of the arms that cradled him, heard the continued crying, now tears of relief. Jack opened his eyes as fast as he could and gazed up into Ianto’s tear-stained face, checking quickly for signs of physical harm before they found each other’s eyes and held the gaze.

Ianto swallowed, finding it difficult to breath as his heart seemed to swell in his chest and push everything else out of its way. His tears grew hotter as he helped Jack to sit up and pulled him close, pressing a hand against his chest to feel the now strong but elevated heart beat. That was too much for him, and he sobbed out Jack’s name as he collapsed forwards into his arms, feeling one wrap tight around his waist and the other come around his shoulders, even as his own arms wound around the strongly muscled waist in front of him.

Two fingers under his chin tilted his head gently but firmly upward and his lips, finally, met Jack’s. It was messy and passionate and fierce; tongues, teeth and lips clashing together as both men poured their aching, their longing for each other and the pain of their separation into that kiss, the contact and the fiery passion burning away all their hurt.

Aragorn heard Ianto's cry and turned back, dreading what he would see. The last thing he expected was the sight of the two men locked in the tight, passionate embrace, holding each other so tightly that it seemed like the could and would never let go; probably their intention. He caught Rhodwine’s eye and beckoned him over, gazing West into the sunset to give the reunited couple some privacy.

Ianto brought his hands up to cradle Jack’s face and pulled back to kiss him more tenderly and gently, savouring his unique taste and essence after their long, painful separation. Their tears mingled on their faces and flowed together to the blood soaked ground, expunging everything but love, joy and relief.

Jack pressed a kiss to Ianto’s forehead and pulled him to rest his head against his chest, where the young man’s tears soaked his bloodied tunic, “I thought I’d never see you again.” He whispered, cradling Ianto to him.

His lover tilted his head up and gazed at him with eyes full of devotion and trust, “I knew you’d find me Cariad, you always keep your promises.”

Jack closed his eyes and felt Ianto shift in his arms again so that he was kneeling up in front of him and their foreheads were resting against each other, “Ianto, I’m sorry…”

A hand on his mouth stopped him mid apology and Ianto stroked his soft, full lips gently, “Don’t apologise Jack, you did what you had to do, and now we’re here and we’re together.” This time it was his turn to pull Jack against his neck and the immortal let go completely, “It’s OK Jack, I’ve got you.” He smiled, “And it wasn’t a dream after all.”